Hey, it’s been a while….where’ve ya been? : ) I’ve been having a blast without much extra time. Alexis is home. We joined a new church…..one that we seem to fit so well with it’s amazing……it’s the one where we went to do the fast…..that’s how God got us there, now we don’t want to leave : ) I did end up doing another one in April as well, (fast). Monday, (and this is only Tuesday), I decided to juice and do smoothies for the week, I wanted to ask God for help with some things and use it to control my weight as well. Last night I was reading a book, (part of a homework assignment for a class I’m taking at church on the Holy Spirit….it’s way cool), and read, “Fasting does not change God, it changes me”. The man who wrote it was talking about going on a hay day with his eating then going down to 1 meal a day when he was really busy and being, “spiritual”, but that made him weak and tired. God told him, “fasting doesn’t change me….I’m the same no matter what….it changes you….so why not just live a fasted life”? “Keep your flesh under all the time”. That really stuck out to me and I wrote it down. Even though I know this, I seem to forget. I use fasting as a bargaining chip……Dear Santa, (God), I would like……and I am going to fast in exchange for it….ha ha. He does give me most of what I want though….but it’s because fasting brings me back in alignment with Him…..and I think that what I want is really his nudge to me to get back on track.
This morning I went out to run a 5K….I did it several days ago….holy moly…..thanks to Alexis. A couple of weeks ago, I couldn’t/wouldn’t run 1/2 a block, but she got me to keep going for 2 miles with out stopping and I did it the next day and the next and thought I would just see how far I could go on Saturday morning….and wow….I actually made it the entire way! Soooooooo…….I went out to do that again this morning…..it’s a really good thinking time too…..although, I ended up walking quite a bit of it……I did that because it seemed as though God were having a real good talking to with me…..and I wanted to listen. Being the obsessive/compulsive person that I am….I keep trying new things….of course with the goal of just being able to get away with as much as I possibly can…..but I keep going around the same mountain, (regarding food). There are things that I know are good for my kids….that they would save them selves so much struggle if they would just listen to me….and they do for the most part….they are amazing kids…..but there’s always that one thing that we all need to just “make” work on our own that we really don’t have the control over that we think we do……watching someone else struggle with something that you just know the easier way is really to just let go of it can be as big of a struggle as the person struggling…..especially someone that you love…..but we all have free will. I felt like God was being the parent and reminding me that the easier way really is to let go…..relinquishing control is not something that I do well…..but God has always….every single time…..proven to be right…..and I’m so much better off when I listen….yet, I always think that I can come up with a better plan. Living a fasted life is safe, freeing, enjoyable and takes me to heights that I’m only able to obtain through obedience….it’s really quite a good deal.
I’m still on this journey with you….are you still with me?