I went to a raw food festival here in Michigan! Wow, you see things like that in Brighton in the UK or California…..but not usually in Brighton Mi : ) It was an interesting experience. I saw Matt Monarch and Angela Stokes Monarch in real life and talked to them. They are like modern day hippies, they’re very cute and it was cool to meet them. I saw many other people too….I expected to see a bunch of totally healthy, beautiful and vibrant people with incredible health. I saw many kinds of people, some were like that…but very few with the description that I just said….the Monarch’s did exhume radiance and heath….she is one of us if you read her story….or similar. I’ve always kept in the back of my mind since learning about raw foods that if I ever quit the recovery program that I’m in for compulsive eating, I would just be a raw foodist and eat what ever, when ever and as much as I wanted. I see the value in moderation, knowing the limits, and balance….left to my own devices….I will not do that. Raw and living foods are very important to vibrant health though….very important…..so is cutting out the processed foods and refined sugars. The inner hippie in me loves that world though, I couldn’t really live it, but I have such a fascination for it and there is so much that I can incorporate into my own life. I bought the movie, “Super Charge Me” and watched it when I got home…loved it! The next day on Netflix I watched “The Gerson Miracle”. They are both amazing and inspiring movies.
I have been dreaming of a healing center for quite a few years now. A place where people can go to learn and heal. I just don’t know how it’s going to come about. I had a dream about a baby last night, a beautiful baby that I loved. It’s diaper was overloaded, then I left it on the bed to fall off flat on it’s face. I wanted to take good care of it, but I just didn’t know how…there wasn’t a bath available….I have no idea why I left it on the bed but did feel horrible when it fell off. When I woke up, I felt like the baby was “Happy 2 Be Me”. I love it, it’s beautiful, but I’m not taking care of it properly…and it’s a creation of Eric’s and mine. When Brett and Alexis were growing up I asked God constantly for help to make sure that I did what was best for them….and he came through big time! They have both turned out so much better than anything that I could have dreamed of….and I sure didn’t have the natural skills to provide this….God constantly revealed to me what to do, where to go, what to correct, etc. I feel like a very successful parent….but it’s God that did it through me….and I get to enjoy the amazing rewards. (Eric too of course….this has just been my reason for living….my “job” and responsibility…and again, I feel very privileged have been able to do it. So I asked God if he would show me what to do with this. I feel like there is so much that can be done to bring this into fruition….I just don’t know how to do it….I can see it, feel it and love it…it’s amazing and I want so much to live it.
I left real estate last week….I made a mistake. I felt that God had sent me there….and maybe he did….but it wasn’t to sell real estate….I kind of suck at it and the longer I was in it and not producing, the more I would feel bad about myself. I thought that I would sell the homes in my large neighborhood, go around balancing the energy in homes and all would be well….people would love me and I would receive big pay checks : ) Well, it didn’t work out that way. It’s a really hard job. The people who do this deserve love and respect…especially the good ones…it’s a lot of work, you’re always on call….it’s always on your mind….for me, even though I wasn’t doing that much, the stress and rejection was more than I bargained for….not what I had planned. So, the next time you work with a realtor just remember….they are really putting themselves out there….it’s a very personal job and they earn every penny, if not more than they are making….it’s not “easy money”. We should have, “give a realtor a hug day”.
I learned a statement many years ago, “Do what you love and and the money will come.” I told this to Brett a lot while he was looking at the pay scales of jobs in order to pick a major….he wants to be very wealthy….and he will. He is totally enjoying his path….I’ve never known anyone to love learning just for the sake of knowledge as much as he does…he loves school so much and is “living the life”….he’s thinking of becoming a professor….and would be fantastic in that role. Alexis, I have to remind myself of this….right now she is fascinated with being a missionary….but she appreciates the comforts of the way we live….we’re not rich…yet….but we live well….thanks God!!! She has reminded me of it because I get worried about how she will live going down that path….but it’s not my path to pick….that’s between her and God….and I could not be more happy about the person she is. I’ve never seen a kid with such passion and faith in God….it’s the center of her life and her enthusiasm is contagious. I believe that both kids are on the right path by the way they see things. We have a picture at the top of our stairs that says, “Faith is taking the next step, even though you can’t see the entire stair case”. Even when I have taken a “wrong” step, I ask God what to do and he sets it right.
Thirteen years ago, I went back to work as a loan originator. I loved the job, the people that I worked with, wearing pretty clothes, going out to lunch….and knowing that I was capable of such a cool thing. It happened very easy, I breezed through 3 interviews, a 2 hour test, got into the “boys club” as Eric called it and was just clicking and grooving through everything….I was getting tons of loans coming in clumps….life was good. A couple of years into it….I realized that I desperately wanted to be home taking care of my family….but how could I leave this? My marriage was in trouble, my energy was nil, my kids were just getting rushed through everything, what was I going to do? That’s when my aunt died at 57. I was suddenly very aware that we don’t know how much time we really have….If I were to die tomorrow, would I have regrets….the answer was, YES!!!! My values came back into clarity, and it wasn’t “things” that I thought I wanted….although, this experience was very necessary and changed the entire course of my life for the better….and all of the money and things came anyway. There was a lot more appreciation for everything that I took care of at home….from Eric and me. I appreciated my kids so much more….I took time to nurture myself….before “working”, I didn’t feel that I deserved anything, that I wasn’t making a significant contribution….but the experience showed us all how valuable my role was. Now if I were to die tomorrow….would I have any regrets? I want to see my dream of Happy 2 Be Me come true, so I would “miss” that….but I can honestly say, NO….I have done well with what is important and I’m so grateful for my life….I have been blessed beyond what I ever dreamed possible….and it’s because I made God, my marriage and my kids # 1….we’ve struggled and grown….but we’ve grown….and have so much love and security within our family….nothing is more important than that. I followed my passion and am very fulfilled.
I do still think that God sent me back into real estate for a reason…and will make good of it….nothing seems to get wasted….nothing.