Be Still and Know That I am God


Be still and know that I am God, Psalm 46:10 was a strong message to me yesterday and today. We are now on our final cleanse of the year and honestly, I was feeling a little less motivated for this one than I did earlier in the year….wondering if I did too many to really reap the spiritual “rewards” because I wasn’t keeping it as sacred. When I got out of the shower yesterday morning, the list of my “prayers” from the summer fast were on the counter. I’m not quite sure how they got out there….it isn’t huge crazy thing because I keep prayer papers behind my clock there and it didn’t have far to slip out….but it did somehow. I read over the list….which was kind of like a list of chores really…..and felt a little indigent because none of them happened. I thought, “what’s up God, I did what I was supposed to….why didn’t you fulfill this list of demands here?” ha ha. Then I started to realize that I had it a little off….although I do pray for what ever I pray for “or better in the highest good of all concerned”….I was missing the mark a bit. The way that I have been doing this since 2005 is to list what I want help with then do the fasting and prayer….so many times what I have asked for or better comes either during or after….and it just clicks into place. So that led me to believe that my “works” of fasting, (Daniel fasting), while praying was “earning” me my desires….not so…although God does….and quite often….thanks God!….fulfill my needs and many desires. What I believe that I had mixed up was the process and the actual intent of that process. As I learned in “Experiencing God”, God will place a desire in our hearts, then we need his direction, guidance and grace to fulfill that desire. By fasting and praying I am removing the obstacles that are in my control….so that I can hear God, surrender to God and let Him show me what I need and what I want. It really does work so much better that way because He can see what I can’t even dream about because I’m not aware of it….I’ve been shown that so many times…..but I needed to be shown that again : )

This morning has been a beautiful, wonderful, magical awakening. I’ve been shown obstacles, misunderstandings and blockages that have impacted my beliefs…they are things that I haven’t been able to change on my own….and can’t change on my own….I need God to do it….I need(ed) to ask Him to do it….and I did. I said the prayers with Eric, it was quite powerful. I am also very aware of the things that He has already done in my life that I could never have done on my own. The safety, love and trust I feel right now is….I don’t want to say intoxicating because that is a negative word….but it’s an all encompassing, blissful pleasure that I don’t have a word to describe.

Be still and know that I am God reminds me that I just need to relax and spend time with Him so that I can hear Him….that is where I get my direction, I don’t have to work on it, I have to allow it, trust it, follow it…..that is swimming with the current rather than against it. Also, “Seek ye first the kingdom of heaven and all these things will be added unto you“. Can it really be that easy? Yes! But it’s not easy to trust that and fall into the flow….that is the hard part….that is the part of surrender….that is what I was reminded to do. Life is so much better than I ever imagined that it could be….and that’s God’s doing….not mine. I know that I can gratefully trust Him with the rest.

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Both Kids are at their colleges and 21 day cleanse with the gall bladder flush


Hi! It’s been a while. Both kids have gone to their colleges….I wasn’t sure how I was going to handle it….but it’s really okay. I love this “google face time”. We can see them when we talk to them, we can see things that they are seeing, it’s very cool.

Brett had an interesting time going out to California. He decided to go on “tour”….he went to Chicago first to visit a friend then flew to N.Y. to visit some other friends for a few days….he organized it like lay overs….when he was going from N.Y. to San Fransisco the flight was over booked, he volunteered to take the next flight. In return they gave him a voucher for more than he spent on the ticket, let him hang out in the frequent flyers club enjoying the free snacks, drinks, comfy chairs, WiFi and separate bathrooms and when he got on his flight, they took him to 1st class and treated him like a king….not a bad deal at all : )

A couple of weeks before Brett left, we all took Alexis to her school and got her settled as snug as a bug before we left. She loves her school and her major…..and God knew what he was doing when he set her up with her room mate….they get along like 2 peas in a pod….and that’s pretty much the size of their room…..they did deck it out princess style though with floating lights, canopy’s and happy decorations. I feel good about both kids….it took a while though….and I’m so grateful for the regular contact!

We are now on our 4th and final cleanse of the year. As I am writing this I am on day 3 in the evening…..and really looking forward to food again tomorrow….but I feel good. I even treated myself to a facial at dinner time and didn’t miss the food at all : ) This is also my second gall bladder cleanse and I’m excited to see what that produces in the morning. I did the first one about a month ago and saw approximately one cup of “stones” in the bottom of the toilet. According to Traditional Chinese Medicine, the liver holds anger and the gall bladder the ability to move forward….I want that all out of me thank you very much….as well as the physical benefits.

If you have done the gall bladder/liver cleanse, please post your experience here and how you did it….there are quite a few ways of doing it.

Surprising News


My sponsor called me a couple of weeks ago to tell me some shocking news….after 11 years in the 12 step group we were in for our eating disorder she needed to leave for her health.  The structure was too confining for how she now needed to  take care of herself…..it’s perfectly understandable.   At that moment, I had a decision to make….get another sponsor or try it on my own.  It didn’t take much thought.  I have been very into the raw food lifestyle for several years now and that with my food plan worked somewhat well together but it was still pretty rigid and restrictive….which is what I needed 7 years ago and for the years following….I had gotten so far off….well….never truly on….a healthy living plan.  The first couple of days were odd…exciting but scary.  I ate my fruit between meals….it’s better to eat fruit alone on an empty stomach anyway….I ate 1/2 of an avocado on my salad…..I ate vegan chili without measuring every ingredient….I ate some raw oatmeal cookies…..I’ve been living like a normal….no, not normal….but healthy person.  Sugar and flour are no doubt not things I want to go back to…or other harmful substances like pork or aspartame….I’m doing a cleanse right now so everything is vegan…..and I feel amazing!  My energy level is great, my mood….there are no going to the bathroom problems….everything is working better than it ever has….I feel so free!  What is really interesting to me is that I found this program after going on  a Daniel Fast…which is what the cleanse is too….and I’m exiting it on one as well….it’s like God is leading me out.  I really needed the intense structure to get on the right track….and I will definitely go back if I need to….but life is changing, Brett is moving to California, Alexis is going to school 9 1/2 hours from here….Eric  and I are going to travel and we are on the next phase of our lives….I don’t want to be strapped to the food plan….but I do want to stay abstinent, healthy and at my ideal weight…..so far so good….I’m putting it….just like everything else….in God’s hands….and it always works out better than I imagined and in just the right way, form and timing.

25 Days Raw


I’m feeling really good.  The plan was to go 21 days, then vegan for another 19…but I’m happy raw…and it’s January in Michigan!  The cleansing group that I have been privileged to lead is doing so well, pounds have been dropping, but the best part is that people are feeling so good and are wanting to continue eating this way….they’re doing cooked and raw.  Eric gave up his coffee again and could have had it back as of yesterday but chose not to : )  He looks good…his skin has a plumpness and glow to it that it didn’t before.  Others have given up coffee too and you can see it in their faces.  Alexis has been doing this with us from the beginning of the year and is still with it too…she completed her 21 days and took her real milk back and had a little chicken…but nothing processed…she likes how she feels too.  One of the best parts with her was an answer to a prayer, actually two.  She has been undecided on what direction to go in for college….major and school….about 2 weeks ago she was panicking about it, I asked her if she had been saying her prayers and did Reiki….no kidding, within 30 minutes she came running down the stairs all excited because she found a major that incorporated everything that she wanted to do and one of the schools that she was already accepted by had a top program in that area, she has been strong on that ever since.  We haven’t actually visited this college yet because it’s 9 hours away : O….but she has read everything about it and has done every virtual tour available…. now instead of going somewhere warm and sunny for spring break, we will be going deeper into the heart of winter….another : O…but she loves snow.

It’s so heartwarming and motivating to see how cleansing with prayer and purpose impacts people.  Someone following the blog, (Tif : ) even decided to give it a try.

Day 11


Well, I did it.  I felt like going further and I did.  The first 8 days were just juice and smoothies made with Sun Warrior Protein powder and Hemp protein powder…so it has also been all raw….except for some dry spices, miso paste and tea.  Last Thursday, which was day 4, a pimple popped out on my knee….a very painful pimple that I kept bumping.  Throughout that day, the bottom of my foot progressively got more and more painful , (the right foot, the corn is always on the left).  On Friday, I drank an extra green drink and thought that it had eased the pain a bit but it didn’t.  On Saturday the pain was so bad that I was limping, it went from the top of my hip to the bottom of my heel.  Thursday through Saturday…and Sunday morning, I did lots of yoga, drank water and did Reiki.  Finally on Sunday, I was back to normal as if nothing had ever been wrong.  I’ve read quite a bit that old wounds and illnesses will surface during a cleanse, especially if you weren’t eating right when it healed the first time.  In that leg, I had broken the ankle….and that was a spot that really hurt, and I had topical skin cancer….but I was eating healthy when  that was discovered.  All toxins pool in the lower body, especially the hip area….I feel that I went through a nice detox.  Just like always, when it got to the height of discomfort, I was ready to stop the fast….and just like always….I’m so glad that I didn’t.  The past 3 days have been blended drinks instead of juice.  Tomorrow I will start bringing solid foods back in….but raw.

The group I am leading is amazing, I couldn’t ask for better people!  We have only had 2 meetings, but it just feels like such a good flow….I feel privileged to be with them.

Happy 4th of July and “The Sunfood Diet Success System”


Happy 4th Everyone!  I think that this has been the most relaxing 4th of July I’ve ever had and I have with it a deep sense of peace.  Brett and Alexis are out having fun with their friends swimming and seeing people, we had a nice family BBQ yesterday, went up north for a half a day and today spent pretty much all of it, (just Eric and me), out on the deck.  The weather has been so beautiful!

I have had the book “The Sunfood Diet Success System” by David Wolfe for about 9 years or so.  I found out about it from a woman in my meditation group whom I was also working with at the time….I remember reading that I could eat as much as I wanted as long as it was raw and lose weight….I was all for that!  I tried it, I didn’t really read the book, just the part that said I could have as many avocados and mangos as I wanted….and I did….I didn’t lose weight.  The book has pretty much been on the shelf since.  As you know I have done the raw food diet since and have kept to 60-75% raw.  I actually never did go 100% raw because I was using kefir and yogurt for protein and they are pasteurized, (cooked), but I still had some amazing results in my few short months of following it.  Emotional baggage surfaced and left.  Weight just fell off, which meant that I got to eat more.  My energy was abundant.  My outlook was very positive.  I really enjoyed it…so why did I stop?  Convenience.  I didn’t want my life to be any more restrictive than it was with the no sugar no flour so I slowly started eating more and more cooked foods and more and more animal proteins….mostly eggs, yogurt and cheese…..sometimes chicken, fish or beef….but not much.

For the past few months the thought of doing it again will pop into my head with excitement….but then I think, no, it’s too much work and more restriction….and what I do is fine.   I’m healthier than I have ever been, my weight is stable, I look better than I ever have, I’m happy, etc…why fix what isn’t broken?  So I haven’t changed.  Last week I took “Esoteric Healing II”, it’s more energy work….that really helped make some things really come together for me in so many ways…but that’s not why I’m talking about it.  On the last day we did a meditation, and in this meditation where we connected with our Higher Selves and God, we also connected to a group of teachers….when you do energy work, you get spiritual help.  In my meditation and in my “group”, I only saw one face, David Wolfe’s.  I thought that was odd and really didn’t think much more about it.  The next day the image was strong in my thoughts so I asked God if He were directing me to David Wolfe and raw foods….I got the feeling to go and find this book and read it….I usually comb the internet for information like that, he has a lot of You Tube videos, a web site….a couple of them actually….my point is that reading this book was the furthest thing from my mind….I have seen it, didn’t really get it…..and it’s huge….about an inch and a half thick….but I found it and started reading it.  This time it has made perfect sense to me….a lot has changed over the past 9 years…..and this book is awesome!  It also tied into the spiritual healing and work that I do….it connected more dot’s…..and it gave me the desire to do it again….it gave real meaning to it, physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.  I also really appreciated how he goes about it in the book….slow but sure rather than and over night complete change then binge because it’s too much…..it just makes sense on all levels, more now than ever.  I read the entire book this weekend….it’s actually a very good reading book.  Now my intent is to go through it again and actually do the exercises he has at the end of the chapters as well as go more raw again.  He says that if you do 95% raw, you get 95% results but if you do 100% raw, you get 1000% results….sounds like a great investment to me!  I’m not going to do it over night though, I have more to learn on how I’m going to do it….but I have a good idea, Cea HOW rules are still the top priority.

I just wanted to share that with you and invite you to do this with me….and like always, I will be letting you know how it’s going : )

The China Study


I just love what comes to me during a fast.  A few months ago I was given this book to read but because I was preparing for an open house with this person, I didn’t take the time to read it thoroughly, I was more focused on the event.  This has just been “in my face” somehow to the point that I had to go out and get it yesterday.  How fascinating!  It’s about a professor at Cornell University…specializing in bio-medical research….Brett looked into that….but he seems to be more excited about electricity : )   He was brought up on a farm and totally believed in dairy, meat, eggs, etc….they even found a way to make the animal feed higher in protein.  His goal was to make this even more refined, more protein rich…so they could eat more meat.  He studied with 3rd world countries that were deficient in protein….amongst other things….and high in liver cancer, the conclusion was that they needed more protein.  Through his research….and I’m only several chapters into it….he began seeing that the opposite was true…..protein….especially the protein in dairy products ignited the cancer and plant proteins shut it down.  In the normal world….when I’m not on a Daniel Fast…..I live on yogurt….if you know my story, you know that cancer ran an ugly rampant race through my family.  Alexis loves cream and milk….Brett loves milk on cereal…..Eric drinks a whey protein shake for lunch every day…..it does say that a small amount , (under 5% didn’t seem to be a problem), but some of what we are doing could lead to disaster.  I find it so interesting that this comes at this point.  As much as I love yogurt….and I do…..I don’t love it that much….I feel like this is a warning…..and sorry family….I’m going to shake things up again….I love you!!!!