My sponsor called me a couple of weeks ago to tell me some shocking news….after 11 years in the 12 step group we were in for our eating disorder she needed to leave for her health. The structure was too confining for how she now needed to take care of herself…..it’s perfectly understandable. At that moment, I had a decision to make….get another sponsor or try it on my own. It didn’t take much thought. I have been very into the raw food lifestyle for several years now and that with my food plan worked somewhat well together but it was still pretty rigid and restrictive….which is what I needed 7 years ago and for the years following….I had gotten so far off….well….never truly on….a healthy living plan. The first couple of days were odd…exciting but scary. I ate my fruit between meals….it’s better to eat fruit alone on an empty stomach anyway….I ate 1/2 of an avocado on my salad…..I ate vegan chili without measuring every ingredient….I ate some raw oatmeal cookies…..I’ve been living like a normal….no, not normal….but healthy person. Sugar and flour are no doubt not things I want to go back to…or other harmful substances like pork or aspartame….I’m doing a cleanse right now so everything is vegan…..and I feel amazing! My energy level is great, my mood….there are no going to the bathroom problems….everything is working better than it ever has….I feel so free! What is really interesting to me is that I found this program after going on a Daniel Fast…which is what the cleanse is too….and I’m exiting it on one as well….it’s like God is leading me out. I really needed the intense structure to get on the right track….and I will definitely go back if I need to….but life is changing, Brett is moving to California, Alexis is going to school 9 1/2 hours from here….Eric and I are going to travel and we are on the next phase of our lives….I don’t want to be strapped to the food plan….but I do want to stay abstinent, healthy and at my ideal weight…..so far so good….I’m putting it….just like everything else….in God’s hands….and it always works out better than I imagined and in just the right way, form and timing.
It’s not just the way you eat, it’s a way of life. I’m not 100%, although I was for the first 42 days of the year, but I am following it pretty well, I would say at least 90%…probably more. I’m not all vegan at this point either, although we are going to do 4 cleanses this year and I will be then. Eric still hasn’t had coffee! That is so amazing….just as amazing as it was for me. He too is drinking Teechino and it has really done the trick for him. We are both having a Vitamin C drink that has some caffeine and ginseng in it…so we aren’t totally there…but so much better. We have had more strongholds released….that was VERY interesting….as a couple it’s interesting how we have issues that cross, things we knew were sore spots, but not the real reason why….and that have now been released.
Kid wise, this is an exciting time….a bit frightening….just the letting go part, I so love to be in control you know….I am really needing to trust God again….and He has proven to be quite trustworthy…and awesome : ) Alexis is flying out to Nicaragua tomorrow for the 10 day mission trip, I’m crossing every T and dotting every I, a little nervous, but I do have a sense of peace about it….I admit though that I can’t wait until they get back! Brett is flying from coast to coast going to interviews for grad school, right now he’s at Cal Tech in sunny 80 degree weather, next week Boston, then back out to California….he is “living the life”. Eric and I were talking this morning about one kid staying in a posh hotel getting shuttled around, fed, seeing exciting people in a beautiful atmosphere. The other will be sleeping on an air bed…also meeting exciting people, being fed and in a beautiful atmosphere….but completely different ends of the spectrum….and they are both extremely excited to be doing what they are doing.
I was watching a television sermon this week that is talking about if you had 30 days left to live, what would you do? We played with that idea at our small group earlier this week…..aside from emptying our bank accounts and living it up…what would you do with that money, who would you do it with? I also pondered the question of, “if I were to die today, what would I regret”…..the truth is, nothing. When my Aunt Carole died….about 11 years ago….I did ponder that question….and I took it seriously. My regrets at that point would have been that I missed anything with my kids…..I didn’t need to work, yet I had a good job, it was hard for my ego to let go of it….I pondered leaving it for a year before my aunt died but when she did after just turning 57, I decided not to ponder but to take action…I have no doubt in my mind that that wasn’t part of her plan…no one saw it coming, it was a real blow…and only the beginning unfortunately for more. As tragic as that was, I am grateful for the gift of awareness and that I have done what I really wanted to do up to this point….I have so much more left to do….and I have received so many more gifts as a result of following my heart. That helps me now that it is time for Brett and Alexis to begin their paths of who they are….and I want them to be everything God created them to be, I want them to follow their passion and live life to the fullest….and I can trust God that He will be there for them everywhere and in everything….I have to.
I’m feeling really good. The plan was to go 21 days, then vegan for another 19…but I’m happy raw…and it’s January in Michigan! The cleansing group that I have been privileged to lead is doing so well, pounds have been dropping, but the best part is that people are feeling so good and are wanting to continue eating this way….they’re doing cooked and raw. Eric gave up his coffee again and could have had it back as of yesterday but chose not to : ) He looks good…his skin has a plumpness and glow to it that it didn’t before. Others have given up coffee too and you can see it in their faces. Alexis has been doing this with us from the beginning of the year and is still with it too…she completed her 21 days and took her real milk back and had a little chicken…but nothing processed…she likes how she feels too. One of the best parts with her was an answer to a prayer, actually two. She has been undecided on what direction to go in for college….major and school….about 2 weeks ago she was panicking about it, I asked her if she had been saying her prayers and did Reiki….no kidding, within 30 minutes she came running down the stairs all excited because she found a major that incorporated everything that she wanted to do and one of the schools that she was already accepted by had a top program in that area, she has been strong on that ever since. We haven’t actually visited this college yet because it’s 9 hours away : O….but she has read everything about it and has done every virtual tour available…. now instead of going somewhere warm and sunny for spring break, we will be going deeper into the heart of winter….another : O…but she loves snow.
It’s so heartwarming and motivating to see how cleansing with prayer and purpose impacts people. Someone following the blog, (Tif : ) even decided to give it a try.
Well, I did it. I felt like going further and I did. The first 8 days were just juice and smoothies made with Sun Warrior Protein powder and Hemp protein powder…so it has also been all raw….except for some dry spices, miso paste and tea. Last Thursday, which was day 4, a pimple popped out on my knee….a very painful pimple that I kept bumping. Throughout that day, the bottom of my foot progressively got more and more painful , (the right foot, the corn is always on the left). On Friday, I drank an extra green drink and thought that it had eased the pain a bit but it didn’t. On Saturday the pain was so bad that I was limping, it went from the top of my hip to the bottom of my heel. Thursday through Saturday…and Sunday morning, I did lots of yoga, drank water and did Reiki. Finally on Sunday, I was back to normal as if nothing had ever been wrong. I’ve read quite a bit that old wounds and illnesses will surface during a cleanse, especially if you weren’t eating right when it healed the first time. In that leg, I had broken the ankle….and that was a spot that really hurt, and I had topical skin cancer….but I was eating healthy when that was discovered. All toxins pool in the lower body, especially the hip area….I feel that I went through a nice detox. Just like always, when it got to the height of discomfort, I was ready to stop the fast….and just like always….I’m so glad that I didn’t. The past 3 days have been blended drinks instead of juice. Tomorrow I will start bringing solid foods back in….but raw.
The group I am leading is amazing, I couldn’t ask for better people! We have only had 2 meetings, but it just feels like such a good flow….I feel privileged to be with them.
I’ve had the same juices all 3 days so I didn’t re-post it. So far, so good. Yesterday was the most detoxifying….the second day usually is, I took another shower before I went to bed and felt so much better. I know I seem to say this every time I go on a cleanse…..but….that corn that shows up on my foot all the time was there again, and painful, it’s been painful for at least a month and I’ve been aware of it for longer….it’s gone! I feel like continuing the juicing for a while longer, the next couple of days are pretty busy and it feels easier to do that than to figure out what to eat, I feel like more will be released if I continue too….and I really don’t feel like eating yet….which is very strange for me so I want to honor what my body is telling me. Alexis has been doing this with me, I’m so impressed! She is going on a medical mission trip to Nicaragua with our church in February and also needs to pick her college, so praying and fasting are a really good thing for her right now. I’m also praying for her, I feel that God is leading her to the trip, and leading me to let her go….this is her 3rd one….but the first out of the country. There are 3 adults that we know well going and the leader has taken this trip over 20 times, she’s my baby and sometimes I can’t believe that I’m letting her do this, but then a calm will come over me…I’m really hoping that it’s God saying that everything will be okay….of course that is on the top of my prayer list too….along with both kids getting into the right colleges for them and other things. Eric started today. I have a group starting Friday and Monday….this is a great start to the year I must say : )
Here’s what I’m having today:
Breakfast: Green Magma Plus. 1 scoop Sun Warrior Raw Protein Powder, (vanilla), 8 oz blueberries and banana, 1 T maca powder, 1 T stevia, 1 T c hia seeds blended in about 16 oz water….oh, and a scoop of Irish Moss. (it’s a sea weed that you work with to make a gel….I tried it yesterday and it seemed to give me extra energy….I’ll see if I feel the same today).
Lunch: 2 C carrot and celery juice, 1/2 sweet potato juiced, 1 apple juiced, 1 lemon juiced….peel and all. 1 scoop Sun Warrior Raw Protein Powder, chocolate, 1 T chia seeds, 1 T Irish Moss.
Dinner: 3 C carrot, celery, beet and tomato juice, (I will heat it just to warm on the stove and add garlic, 1 t miso paste, 1/2 t raw honey, 1/2 T raw apple cider vinegar, sea salt, cayenne pepper), 1 scoop chocolate protein powder, 1 T chia, 1 T Irish Moss.
I’m starting with a 3 day juice fast, it re-boots the system and makes it easier to transition. There are buckwheat groats, sunflower seeds and a spicy seed mixture sprouting in my laundry room to be ready for Wednesday. There is also a jar of quinoa “rejuvelac” fermenting on my counter. See you tomorrow, have a great day!
I LOVE New Years. Not for the parties or the dresses….and certainly not for the drinks or the food…..I love New Years resolutions. This year will mark 19 years of no alcohol, 12 years of no cigarettes, with a few exceptions, about 8 without the gum, 7 years of no sugar/no flour, coffee is out of the picture….and so much more. They didn’t all go right at New Years…alcohol did and the other things on many occasions, but may not have stuck until later in the year…but so what? I love to improve, I love to be free of addictions, I love to make lists of goals and check them at the end of the year and now it’s that time again : ) We have a group doing a 21 day cleanse that will begin on the 9th. I’m going to start on the 1sth though since I’m the leader and want to be at my best for the other people….a good leader : ) This year I’m going to crank it up a notch. I’m going totally raw for the 21 days, maybe for more, but definitely the 3 weeks, and I’m jazzed. What I really enjoy about the New Years cleanse, or Daniel fast is the clarity I get, the surrender and closeness to God. I’m not sure why what I eat or don’t eat has such an impact on my emotions, mental state and spiritual state, but it really does. Earlier today I realized that I don’t think that I could have stuck to the no sugar/no flour eating without a guide….that way of living was foreign to me and would have been temporary….just like raw food has been, I get to my goal, then go back to the way I was eating before, so does that mean that I need to stay raw? I don’t know, but I’m going to ask for clarity during this cleanse. I have gotten to a higher level of trust with God and if I feel that He is guiding me to do it, then He will show me the way and I will. It seems so radical….but so did living without sugar and flour. I always feel so good when I do the cleanses, a heightened awareness, more energy, a calmness and security that is deeper than normal….so it does make me wonder. For now, I’m committing to 3 weeks…and looking forward to it….of course I will let you know how it’s going : ) What are your goals for the year? Are you as excited as I am? Oh, I almost forgot! Last year, I was so hooked on Pepsi Max that I didn’t let go of it for the cleanse/fast, but I put it on my list asking God to remove it from me…..Thank you God, I haven’t had any in several months : )